A proper lawn requires an army

this is war

to look like artificial turf

mow them down

with machine gun rat ta tat

merciless fury

give them brush cuts

all the same height

to be soldiers in turf

a large swath of pure, refreshing green

this is the army

every blade in its proper place

right face right, attention

always at attention, you’re army soldiers

be proud, be strong, stand up and be counted

do your job

make the owner proud

he wants to look wealthy

wants to have the perfect lawn

landscapers are here to help create his image

total control,  in charge

just like the neighbors

keep up with the Jones’s

the work doesn’t take long

quick, in and out

we have other landscapes to trim

we scape the land, scrape the land

we rape the land

mow it, mow  mow it, mowt

blow away stray leaves

Suck up grass clippings

in large white canvas bags

tossed into the big truck

a landscapers stock in trade

which drags a big aluminum trailer

loaded with mowers, trimmers, blowers

shovels, rakes, extra gas

all customized to make noise

eardrum shattering, decibel breaking

music of power mowers, grinding, growling

blowing, sweeping without brooms

it’s drill time

up and at ‘em, fall in

each blade a private in a suburban army

to stand at attention,

no slouching

we will cut you down to size

landscapers are the generals, five star

men with colorful bars on chests

boasting their great lawn battles they’ve won

tiny, thin blades of green

humbled, unnoticed, following their leader

the owner man shops at Home Depot

in the gardening isle

big bags of fertilizer, pesticides, herbicides

to feed his lawn, he cares about his lawn

he feels a sense of accomplishment

a satisfaction that he has applied his will

my lawn will be the best lawn

this is his slice of nature

he’s out to kick the face of ecology

his war against diversity, against bald spots

no dandelions – those little yellow spots

dotting his green empire

dig them out, spot spray with poison

finally, his little paradise

looks like a sod farm

look neighbors

look how much I care

this is my castle

i have bent each blade

trained them all to make me proud

this is just about the only thing

I can control. I won the war